LYRICS:

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Larry the Dentist

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Snicker bars and lollipops

I hope this party never stops 

I wish it could be halloween all year

Sour strips and chocolate chips

Sugar dances across my lips

I wish it could be halloween all year

Gummy bears and frightful scares

Creepy costumes everywhere

I wish it could be halloween all year

Licorice and Swedish fish

Take it from the candy dish

I wish it could be halloween all year

Candy corn and midget porn

Jack 'O' Lantern keeps me warm

I wish it could be halloween all year

Celery and carrot sticks-

Vegetables?!?!

This is halloween!

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Walk into your living room

Strap you to your bed of doom 

I wish it could be halloween all year

You thought that your snacks would pass

Shove the carrots up your ass

I wish it could be halloween all year

With no treat you'll get a trick

I'm gonna chop off your dick

I wish it could be halloween all year

Now I'll set your house ablaze

You'll see the error of your ways

I wish it could be halloween all year

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The dentist is creepy,

He is so scary

Puts tools in my mouth

That make me weary

Poking on my gums, 

His name is Larry

He's got many tools

That are so scary

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Pumpkin pails and happy trails

Spooky fun that never fails

I wish it could be halloween all year

M&Ms and Baphomet

Worship Satan then repent

I wish it could be halloween all year

Nail you to a wooden cross

Because the devil is my boss

I wish it could be halloween all year

100 Grand and pentagrams

Gonna sacrifice a lamb
I wish it could be halloween all year

Tonight isn't as it seems

I don't think we'll be redeemed

I wish it could be halloween all year

Larry's on his way back here

We've all got to run in fear

I wish it could be halloween all year

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Well hell0 there children, it's me Larry, Larry the Dentist

It's halloween night and you know what that means, lots of candy

How about I take a little looksy inside your mouths and oh- man, you boys sure have a lot of cavities

Have you been flossing?

And, it looks like you've been worshipping the devil?

Children, worshipping the devil, not flossing, and smoking cigarettes will lead you straight to the Christian Hell

Exodus 21:27 "And if he knocks out a TOOTH of his male or female slave, he shall let them go free on account of his tooth."

Job 29:17 "I broke the JAWS of the wicked and snatched the prey from his TEETH."

Psalm 3:7 "Arise, O Lord; save me, O my God! For you have smitten all my enemies on the CHEEK; You have shattered the TEETH of the wicked."

Proverbs 25:19 "Like a bad TOOTH and an unsteady foot is confidence in a faithless man in the time of trouble."

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Ooooooo Nooooooo Larrryyyyy

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Great Pumpkin

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It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, big and round

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the greatest pumpkin all around

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, big and brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the biggest pumpkin all around

It's the Great Pumpkin

It's the Great Pumpkin

Great Pumpkin

Great Pumpkin

Great Pumpkin

Great Pumpkin

Great Pumpkin

Charlie Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, big and round

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the biggest pumpkin in this damn town

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, big and round

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin, chop-chop Brown

It's the Great Pumpkin

Yeah, that's right

It's the Great Pumpkin

It's the Great Pumpkin, big and round

It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

It's the biggest pumpkin in this damn town

It's the Great Pumpkin, big and round

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Black Lung Craig

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Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Smoked a cigarette one day

Smoked a pack and he got AIDS

Now he's learning the hard way

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

He will burn in Hell some day

For his crimes he can't repay

Cigarettes are devil's candy

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Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

You threw your whole life away

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Just you wait for judgement day

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Hello?

Hello, is this Christian Craig's mother?

Oh, why yes, but uh, who is this?

That's not important, are you aware that your son is smoking cigarettes?

What? My baby boy?

Yes, nicotine cigarettes

Oh, my

Yes, are you aware that cigarettes are known to cause cancer, cardiovascular diseases, death, and even homosexuality

Oh my

But the worst part is, if you smoke cigarettes, you go straight to Hell

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Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

You threw your whole life away

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Just you wait for judgement day

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Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Smoked a cigarette one day

Smoked a pack and he got AIDS

Now he's learning the hard way

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Tried to quit but it won't last

In the lake of fire, he'll be cast

His dick is rarely at full mast 

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Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

You threw your whole life away

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Just you wait for judgement day

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Huh, what the- why's Hudson calling me?

Hello? Yeah, what's up?

Hello, Christian King Craig

Uhh.. what do you want?

Oh nothing... I just uh, I just told your mom you smoke cigarettes

What- dude what the- what the fuck!

Why'd you tell my mom I smoke cigarettes?!

Oh you know, it's cuz your, your going to Hell, so I thought that if I told your mom it would maybe lessen your punishment

Dude what the fuck!

Hold on, my mom's calling me

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Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

You threw your whole life away

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Just you wait for judgement day

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

You threw your whole life away

Black Lung Craig, Black Lung Craig

Just you wait for judgement day

(cough cough cough.... I should stop smoking all those cigarettes)

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The Monster Mash

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I was working in the lab late one night

When my eyes beheld an eerie sight

For my monster from his slab began to rise

Then suddenly to my surprise

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He did the mash

He did the Monster Mash

The Monster Mash

It was a graveyard smash

He did the mash

It caught on in a flash

He did the mash

He did the Monster Mash

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From my laboratory in the castle east

To the master bedroom where the vampires feast

The ghouls all came from their humble abodes

To get a jolt from my electrodes

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They did the mash

They did the Monster Mash

The Monster Mash

It was a graveyard smash

They did the mash

It caught on in a flash

They did the mash

They did the Monster Mash

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The sadness underneath my skin

I don't know where to begin

I need a way to kill the pain

Here comes a downpour of rain

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I am so sad

I am so very sad

I am so sad

I am so very sad

I am so sad

I am so very sad

I am so sad

I am so very sad

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My faith is strong just like my will

My enemies will die because Jesus kills (the pain)

They'll all regret smoking cigarettes

When they burn in eternal torment

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I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

(One more time!)

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

(One more time!)

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

(One more time!)

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus

I love Jesus Christ

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The Crows

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Do you hear that?

It's the Winds of Change

Do you ever wish that you could just fly away?

That you could just sprout wings and leave this place behind?

Do you ever feel like you're going to Hell?

The Christian one of course

Well, truth be told, unless you've accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior, you're going straight to Hell

And while you're down there

You'll be placed under eternal torment

Horrific demons will grab you and hurt you

And you'll be in so much pain

And you'll wish for nothing more than for a way to kill that pain

Do you hear that?

They're coming

They're coming

They're coming

They're coming

They're coming

They're coming for you

They're coming for you

They're coming for you

They're coming for you

The crows go

Caa caa caa

The sparrows go

Tweet tweet tweet

The winds blow

fffffffffffffffffffffff

And the vultures feed upon my flesh

Ow! Ouch! Owie! Ow! Ouch!

And I cry

Waaaaahhaaaaaahhaaaa

Cry with me everyone

Waahhhahahaaaahhahaha

AAAHHH

In the beginning, God said, "Let there be light"

And he made light, and angels, and goodness

But there is light, there too shall be darkness

(There is about 7 minutes of "lyrics" past this point but most of it is unintelligible)